Lord, You Have My Heart....

All of my life I have known God.

I have known who He is. 

I know the stories I was told in Sunday school.

I know that He loves me.

I have known that He likes singing and dancing.

I know that He listens.

I know He speaks in many different ways.

I know I can trust Him when everything and everyone around me says something different.

I know He is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control

I know His voice.

I know all of these things because I have experienced them in one way or another in my life.

Since being in a wonderful place He has given me rest above what I could ever imagine. He has taken me to deeper depths of His love and fully understanding His mercy and grace over us. He is renewing my mind to be able to walk in a kingdom mindset that all I read about Him in His word and all I hear about Him in testimonies is true and is happening and can happen in my life and through my life. 

Through His heart I can love like Him. 

Through His eyes I can see like Him. 

Through His touch I can touch like Him.

Through His word I can speak like Him. 

Through His ears I can hear like Him.

He totally has my heart and I will forever search for His.

My Heart

Since returning to the US I have been able to really reflect on these past few years since returning to missions: where I have been; who I have met; what God is doing in the nations; etc.. All I have learned has marked me in so many ways and taken me from amazement to complete humbleness. But most of all I have found my heart's desires

I am amazed at what all God has done in and through me. I am not the same woman I was in June 2010. I have come into the biggest understanding that I am a daughter of the King of the universe. I have experienced the love of God in the deepest depths of my heart. His goodness holds no bounds. I have seen His hand of provision in many unexpected ways. I have learned trust, hope, faith and the list goes on. This has been a process and even moments of instant discovery and God has been with me every step of the way. I look forward to all that is still to be discovered.

I have walked with some of the most amazing people as a friend, as a mentor, as a leader, as a spiritual mother. I have stretched, grown, been tested, refined. Life is a forever journey of discover of who we are and what or who is around us. We were made to go out of the comfort of life to be challenged and changed. We were given a mandate to 1- be fruitful and to multiply and 2-to subdue the earth.

Is there fruitfulness in your life? What does this mean? In the simplest of senses we understand two coming together and becoming one in marriage and then being a part of creating new life in sons and daughters. But I believe that multiplication is meant for so much more. Even as we subdue the earth because the fruit of the land multiplies as it is subdued, trimmed, cut back and bound. In our lives we see in John 15 Jesus giving the example that He is the vine and we are the branches. We are trimmed by the cutting off those things that are a hinderance to our growth and fruitfulness.

The Beauty of Creation

Sometimes you never know when God will choose to speak to you through a unconventional way. I personally love symphonies, operas and other forms of art. I love admiring the gifts and talents in others and seeing the end results of their time and hard work. This time I was touched deeply as I watched a piece written by Sir Anthony Hopkins, "And The Waltz Goes On". It wasn't the music that hit my heart even though my heart strings were moved by it's simple beauty but it was as I watched Sir Anthony as the waltz began. This piece was his baby, he wrote it specifically for Andre Rieu the renowned violinist and conductor nearly 50 years ago. Here is was coming to life. But I saw something, I saw this creator reacting to his creation, there was joy, tears, fullness of life, pride and so on.

"For the anxious longing of the creation waits eagerly for the revealing of the sons of God."        - Romans 8:19

How much more our heavenly Father, the creator of the universe, the knitter of our bodies, the breath of our lives, the almighty God responds when we, His children step into all that He places in us to do. He dances, He leaps, He shouts, He sings and so much more. We were meant for greatness. We were meant for so much more than we could even imagine. God is inviting us to join in with Him, to be a part of something bigger than ourselves. Daily we need to choose to be a part of what He has invited us in to. Enjoy the moment. Write down that tune to the melody that is in your head. Hum it, whistle it but whatever you do don't shut it down. The world is waiting for you to share what God has placed inside of you. We need the creativity of one another to bring life into the world around us.
http://youtu.be/Z982cExlFzA?list=PL9WSJWSXT-cVF29fLb035e0VO12hCyWrk

Selfish Desires

Recently I had probably the biggest revelation I have ever had besides discovering the infinite love of God. For years this verse has stuck out to me. It has almost even haunted me as time after time people have shared it with me as a verse God had given them for me. I think, almost in the back of my mind and heart I knew what it meant because it is always my safe place with God.

In Psalm 37:4 King David tells the people to "Take delight in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart."

I, for years, thought this had more to do with making God proud or give God the glory, etc.and He will give me my desires. So selfish and works oriented. But the revelation God gave me was this. If I worship God, if He is the center of my joy, my peace, my delight, then He will reveal to me the desires of my heart. How can I make this clearer? I believe we all have desires. They range from getting a good paying job, a husband or wife, living in a nice home, vacationing in super nice places, etc. But those are all physical desires, human desires, even verging on the brink of sinning desires. While I am not against having a good job, being married, etc. what I believe the Lord is saying is if we place Him above all, if we truly give Him all glory and honor He will give us desires we never knew existed. He will reveal to me the desires that are within me. The difference is these desires are from Him.

This is just another example of the grace of God evident in our lives. When we know our identity as His son or daughter we can live in the freedom of knowing that He longs to give us dreams, visions and desires. Not only does He want to give them to us He longs to fulfill them.

I believe a lot of my time in Barcelona has made this clearer to me because from the beginning I have asked Father God to give me what it is He wants me to do while being here. In some cases I have new desires and in some cases He is asking me to step out into the dreams He has given me in the past. Are there some desires that have yet to be fulfilled in your life? Is there a possibility God is wanting  you to lay this dream down only to let Him bring it back to you at a later date. Take a moment and ask God what desires am I holding on to that are not being met or fulfilled? Are they from You, Lord? He is a good God. He is for you not against you. He wants to give you the desires of your heart.